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Jetsun
Milarepa
Tibet's most famous meditator
(1052-1135)

PART THREE
Hardships Serving His
Guru
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Not far from where Marpa lived there was some open land
in the middle of a village. The local people had all agreed that no
one would own this land and it would be held in common. They had all
signed a paper to this effect, except for Marpa, because he wanted to
build a house there for his son. But he had to be clever about it. If
he just went there and built it, the villagers would protest, so he
had Milarepa first build a round house in the eastern direction. When
Milarepa had half finished it, Marpa said: I don't think this turned
out very well. He told Milarepa to tear it down, return all the
stones to the place where he had taken them, and all the earth back
to the holes where he had dug it. So Milarepa returned all the stones
to their place, all the earth to where it belonged, and then went back
to Marpa: I have followed all your commands, now please teach me
the Dharma. Marpa replied It is not quite time yet. On the peak
to the south, I want you to build a house in the shape of a half circle.
Once you have finished building it, I will teach you the Dharma.
Milarepa again went out and started collecting stones and earth and
began to build up the walls of this second house. When he had progressed
considerably, Marpa came to see him: Who told you to build this house?
Milarepa said, You did.. Marpa replied I must have been
drunk or crazy. I don't remember anything about telling you to build
this house. So Milarepa again had to take down the house and return
all the stones and all the earth back to their places.
Having completed the task, Milarepa went back to Marpa
and said, I have finished all the work you told me to do. Please
grant me the teachings of Dharma. Marpa said to him Now in the
future you shouldn't be doing work that you weren't told to do. Actually
what really needs to be built is a triangular-shaped building, which
should be put on a peak in the western direction. If you finish this
house, I will teach you the Dharma, and not only that, I will celebrate
it with a great feast. This time Milarepa was a little anxious about
the directive: Precious lama, the first time you said you hadn't
thought it through very well, it wasn't what you really wanted, and
the next time you said you really didn't remember having told me to
build that house. Now again you are telling me to build a triangular-shaped
house. Would you mind if I brought in your wife as a witness to this?
Marpa agreed that his wife Dagmema could be the witness. Dagmema said:
Maybe this is work my husband doesn't really need. I am not really
sure what the reason is behind all this work he has given you, but if
it is done for the sake of the Dharma, then it is good work so I will
be a witness. They wrote a letter that said once these walls were
built, they would not be torn down and that Milarepa would receive Dharma
teachings.
Again, Milarepa went to gather together earth and rocks
to make a house, and slowly the walls of the house were built up. It
was such heavy work however, that large sores began to appear on his
back. Since he could no longer carry things on his back, he carried
them on his hip, but then sores also developed there, and so he carried
things on his chest and sores developed there. He was surrounded by
sores, and not only that, the water and earth he was carrying to make
mortar entered into them and it was very painful for him. Yet he thought,
Well, this is the command of my lama and continued his work with
diligence and energy. Though he was in such pain Milarepa reflected:
I can't really show these sores or speak of these problems to Marpa
because he is a very high lama and also he would probably get angry
with me. His wife is full of compassion and kindness but if I show them
to her, she would probably think I am proud of all the work I've done.
With no place to turn, he was filled with despair and weeping in the
house. Dagmema came and asked him why he was crying, but Milarepa did
not reply. She lifted up his chin and said: Don't cry; you will get
the Dharma teaching. Milarepa finally told her his real feelings:
You are kind to me as a mother. And in order to obtain the precious
Dharma, I must build this house. Yet in building this house my body
is becoming nothing but a huge wound. Until now I have worked as hard
as I can carrying stones and earth, but it is extremely painful.
Dagmema now looked at Milarepa's body which had been covered before,
and seeing all his festering, open sores, she cried: You are right.
I've never seen such wounds on a human being before. Your situation
is even worse than an animal's. A horse only gets saddle sores on its
back, but you have them all over your body. I don't understand why Marpa
is making you go through all of this. But stay here and I will take
care of you. I will go to Marpa on your behalf and try to see if I can't
arrange for you to receive the Dharma. Dagmema went to Marpa and
described to him what Milarepa was going through, and Marpa also cried,
Such diligence and great effort made for the sake of Dharma and to
fulfill the commands of the lama makes me very happy. Marpa agreed
that until Milarepa's wounds were healed, he could stay; Dagmema could
give him good food and bring him back to health. She took good care
of him and Milarepa was happy. His mind, however, was not satisfied;
he had not yet received the Dharma.
One day Marpa was giving the initiation of Chakrasamvara
(Demchok). Many of his students had come and brought wonderful offerings.
Milarepa also went and happily joined the crowd. But Marpa looked at
him and said, What do you have to offer? Milarepa replied, Well,
I've been building this house and that's my offering. Marpa admonished
him: You're building this house but it's not finished. It's a finished
house that you must offer. And he chased Milarepa away, but Milarepa
did not leave immediately even though he'd been told to. He made his
request again: Please, let me stay and receive this initiation.
Marpa came up to him, cuffed him across the face and tossed him outside.
Milarepa went sobbing to Dagmema, who comforted him, Don't worry.
Slowly, with time, you will receive the Dharma. Sometime after this
initiation, Marpa came to Milarepa. We had a little bit of a set-to
the other day. Has your mind not turned against me for this? Milarepa
replied, I have committed monstrous negative actions. They are the
cause of the bad things that happen to me. My faith in the lama has
not changed, not at all. Marpa said, That's true. I went through
great difficulties in order to bring the Dharma back from India. So
now, you go back and finish building the walls. One day, Marpa came
to Milarepa, who was in the process of building the triangular-shaped
house. Great Magician, who told you to build this house? Lama, you
were the one who told me to build this house. Marpa retorted, This
is a triangular-shaped house. Triangular-shaped houses are for evil
magicians who use mantra in their practices. What are you doing? Planning
on staying here and performing black magic on me? Are you going to kill
me? Marpa commanded that he tear down this magician's palace and
replace the stones where they came from and carry the earth back to
its place.
Once more Milarepa returned and reported to Marpa that
he had fulfilled his command. Marpa replied, "Well, what do you need
then?" "I need the Dharma. Please give me the Dharma," begged Milarepa.
Marpa finally agreed and told Dagmema to make a very good meal and give
it to Milarepa. Then Marpa gave him refuge vows and advice. He also
gave him the short spiritual biography of Naropa that describes the
twelve difficulties he had to go through. Marpa said to Milarepa, I
have given you now what is called the common or general Dharma. As I
said, if you want the uncommon or exceptional Dharma, you must have
the capacity to go through extreme difficulties to demonstrate faith
in the lama and to maintain stable, unchanging samaya. Is this something
you can do?
The fourth house that Milarepa was asked to buildt was
to become the famous nine-storied tower called Se Kar Gu Tok, "the house
with nine stories for the son." Marpa had drawn the plan for it on the
ground, and Milarepa had started the construction. As the tower was
located on the land of the village where no one was supposed to build,
the people became concerned: What's going to happen with this house
that's going up on our land? Some thought, Well, maybe Marpa
won't really build it. He's started all these other houses and they've
come down. Other people said: Well, I think he's just crazy.
He's having all these houses put up by this student who's real strong.
Three-cornered houses and four-cornered houses, and they're just going
up and down and this one is going to come down, too, just like the rest
of them. And then they said, If he doesn't destroy this house,
then we'll gather together and fight him. We'll bring it down ourselves.
The nine-story tower was built all the way up to the top. Milarepa built
all himself, with not even one stone being carried by another person.
He went through untold physical hardship, as related in his full biography,
now published in English. By the end, the only thing missing was the
roof. At last when the villagers realized that this one was not going
to be destroyed, they got together and decided to attack it. Realizing
what was happening, Marpa created an illusory army that circled the
tower in all directions preventing anyone from coming close. The villagers
were astounded. Where did all these soldiers come from to protect
Marpa? Seeing they were up against a force beyond their strength,
they went to Marpa, apologized, and promised that they would not destroy
this tower.
During the long and difficult period of the tower construction,
no matter what Milarepa did, Marpa would never give him the teachings.
Milarepa finally despaired: It looks as if I'm not going to get Dharma
teachings from Marpa. I'll have to go to another lama. He went to
Dagmema, and explained his thoughts to her. She consoled him, Well,
it's all right. You're not to blame for this. The lama's very difficult,
and he's given you a tough time. Keep working on the house, and I will
work something out so that you can receive Dharma teachings. One
day, Dagmema wrote a letter making it seem as if it came from Marpa,
and sent it to one of his main disciples, Lama Nyokpa. It read, "I'm
extremely busy. There's much to do, too many students, and I can't give
teaching to this Great Magician. Please, give him some Dharma teachings."
There was a festival coming up, a grand ritual celebration, and Dagmema
had made some beer, actually very strong beer, which she gave to Marpa
during the ceremonies. He got quite drunk and she was able to take his
seal and stamp the letter. In Tibet, letters are not signed, but stamped
with a personal seal, which is guarded carefully. Then Dagmema borrowed,
so to speak, a ruby mala that had belonged to Naropa and also bone ornaments
that had belonged to him. She sent these along with the letter as a
sign that this was the real thing. Giving the letter, the ruby mala,
and the bones to Milarepa, Dagmema said: Here, take these blessed
objects and this letter, but don't say I'm the one who gave them to
you. Pretend they are from Marpa and that you are one of his disciples.
Take these to Lama Ngokpa. I will say prayers for you. Practice diligently.
Don't have any wrong views about Marpa. I have great hope that you will
indeed receive teachings from him eventually. She gave him tea,
butter, and something like Tibetan cheesecake and sent him on his way.
When Milarepa left, he was of two minds. On the one hand, he was very
happy because he was finally going to receive the Dharma, and on the
other he was sad for he had to separate from Dagmema, who had been so
kind to him. He shed tears and asked her, "Please do not forget me.
Keep me in your prayers. Make prayers that we will meet again, and I
will do the same." And so he parted from her.
As Milarepa went along his way, he asked where Lama Ngokpa's
house was and finally found it. As he approached, Lama Ngokpa was sitting
on a high throne teaching hundreds of students. When Milarepa came to
him, he was reciting these lines: I am the
one who explains, I am the Dharma that is explained, and I am those
who have gathered to hear the teachings. I am the guide of the world
and the one who creates the world. I am of the world and beyond it.
I am the true nature of spontaneous bliss. In Tibetan tradition,
the point at which teachings are interrupted by such an event are considered
very significant. Milarepa bowed to Lama Ngokpa from a distance. The
lama stood up on his high throne, took off his hat, and bowed in response
to Milarepa's prostrations. The students were surprised and asked their
lama, Who is this that you're treating with such respect? Lama
Ngokpa replied, Ask him who he is. His way of prostrating is like
that of Marpa, so I assumed he was his disciple and bowed to him.
One of the students approached and questioned Milarepa who responded
as Dagmema had told him--he lied. He said that he was a student of Marpa's,
that he had come to take Dharma teachings from Lama Ngokpa, that Marpa
had sent him, and that he had brought a ruby mala and bone ornaments
from Naropa as confirmation. When Lama Ngokpa heard this from his students,
he was extremely happy. Wonderful! Tell him not to come right away,
but to wait. The students brought Milarepa some beer to drink, and
said that they were going to form a great procession for him in the
traditional style with victory banners, music, and the monks wearing
all their fine robes. Milarepa was asked to wait until they could receive
him properly. He was exuberant. With all the brilliant ceremony he thought
had arrived in the land of the gods and now at least he was going to
receive the teaching. He reflected this was all due to the kindness
of Dagmema and shed tears remembering her.
Lama Ngokpa gave Milarepa teachings and also taught him
how to practice. Milarepa meditated for quite a while, but nothing happened--nothing
at all. There were no signs of realization, no experiences, nothing.
Lama Ngokpa was astounded: With these teachings, there's no way that
nothing can happen. What's going on? He began to have some doubts,
so he questioned Milarepa more closely, and finally Milarepa told the
truth: Well, actually, that letter wasn't from Marpa and neither
was the mala or the bone ornaments. Lama Ngokpa replied, Well,
that must be the truth, because without the lama's blessing, experience
and realization cannot arise. About this time a letter arrived for
Lama Ngokpa from Marpa. It read: "The house is finally finished and
I'm going to have a big celebration in honor of this occasion. Please
come with your students and bring whatever you have to offer. As for
that lousy student of mine, you can bring him along, too." Except for
one goat with a bad leg, which he thought wasn't good enough to offer
and thus left at home, Lama Ngokpa took everything he had gathered throughout
his life as an offering to Marpa. As they approached Marpa's house,
Lama Ngokpa felt a little tired, it having been a long journey, and
so he said to Milarepa: You go on ahead, and from the house bring
me out some beer to drink. Before we get there, I'd like to just rest
a little bit. Milarepa went to the house and met Dagmema, who was
delighted to see him. He delivered Lama Ngokpa's message and Dagmema
said, Fine, but first we should go and greet Marpa. Milarepa
explained to Marpa that Lama Ngokpa had come, that he was a little tired
from the journey and that he would like some beer. Marpa became furious:
What! I went to India at the risk of my life to get this Dharma teaching
from Naropa. No one was there to greet me with beer. What's this person
talking about? If he wants beer, he can come to the house. Once
again Dagmema demonstrated kindness, and sent beer out to them.
Soon, the party arrived at Marpa's house. Lama Ngokpa
then said to Marpa, I give you power over my body, speech, and mind,
and all the wealth that I have. Whatever I possess, I offer to you.
The only thing I haven't offered you is one goat with a bad leg. I ask
you to give me the special instructions of the Dakinis. Marpa replied,
All the other Dharma I know I have given you, but if you want to
receive this secret instruction of the Dakinis, you'll have to bring
me that goat. Lama Ngokpa himself went back to his house and fetched
the goat. It took him one day to return to his house, and then he walked
the whole night back with the goat on his shoulders and offered it to
Marpa.